Mental Polarities

[vitalsigns]

Polarities, such as, up/down, east/west, right/left are natural polarities. The mind generally deals in unnatural polarities. I’ve seen this referred to as, “polarity of definition.” Which is an invention of the mind with the purpose of being right.

In order for the mind to be right about something, there must be a subject to be right about, and someone to take on the role of being wrong. So the mind picks a convenient issue and finds the gaps within a person’s statements that we disagree with - which defines a polarity.

This is accomplished by interpreting both sides of an issue and then determining one side to be right, and the other to be wrong. Of course, our mind is our greatest advocate, so we are always on the right side of an issue.

Within the mind, these artificial polarities do not allow for completion and mastery but provide only for a condition of being right.

Polarities are the stuff out of which prejudice, opinion, position, and judgment are made, and the process of polarization is the foundation of all mental roadblocks. It closes off all avenues through which human beings can communicate. It closes off all side roads through which we can have compassion with and nurture each other. Polarization occurs at such an unconscious level that the results it produces seem to be a natural condition in the order of things. Whenever we make someone wrong we create the "other side" which, through the same polarization, makes it his or her quest to make us (individually) wrong.

When this happens, and we can recognize it. Then and only then is very clear that we are the source of our own persecution.

There is something to do about polarization. We can be conscious/aware/enlightened about our reactions. We can take notice when we polarize an issue and if we are conscious about it, we can then be "at choice" about whether to continue with these types of head games. We can also recognize that we can learn much about ourselves from these types of situations. We can ask ourselves what it is about a certain statement that caused us to be on the defensive, or what it is that causes us to have the need to always be right.

We can't seem to stop playing the polarity game until we observe that we are plugged in. So be responsible and notice; then stop. If we are willing to notice the polarity process before you participate, we need never be in another argument. As you should be able to recognize that there are no rights and no wrongs, there are only opinions.

In order to be effective communicators, (as well as open minded human beings,) the best way is to expand to create a context large enough to include "all" positions about what ever issues arise in which we deal in life. If we have to define others as wrong, we constrict the space in which they exist “slightly,” and we constrict the space in which we exist “significantly” Expand your life. "Include" the way other people are within the realm of humanity. "Be inclusive, not exclusive." Be aware of your own mental polarities.

 

[iBrian]

Acepting all positions, possibilities, and probabilities is great while living in the proverbial hermitage. But the moment anyone needs to interract with the outside world, some degree of responsibility is required. Whether to the self, or others, assertive action is required, to feed, clothe, interract - even to choose to learn.

Ultimately, position of polarities seems a rather strawman argument - it looks at issues as being polarised as "right" or "wrong", rather than as responsibly necessary. In other words, it suggests that all action is either black or white, when in fact grey can well be acknowledged, but action nevertheless still has to be definitive.

 

[vitalsigns]

Acepting all positions, possibilities, and probabilities is great while living in the proverbial hermitage. But the moment anyone needs to interract with the outside world, some degree of responsibility is required. Whether to the self, or others, assertive action is required, to feed, clothe, interract - even to choose to learn.

Ultimately, position of polarities seems a rather strawman argument - it looks at issues as being polarised as "right" or "wrong", rather than as responsibly necessary. In other words, it suggests that all action is either black or white, when in fact grey can well be acknowledged, but action nevertheless still has to be definitive.

Brian, Thank you for your honest response.

I wrote this several months ago while dealing with some conflict between a dear friend and myself. It was written while in the midst of my own attempt at understanding why I react in certain ways.

It has helped me, not only to accept the legitimacy of my own viewpoints, but also in seeing that others viewpoints are just as valid for themselves. In knowing that I do not always have to be correct I've built better relations with coworkers, friends and family members. So it has enhanced my life in all areas.

It doesn't mean that I can't express my differences. It means that I can do so in a constructive manner. I can validate the other persons thought's, and then express why mine may be different.

Best Regards,

VS

 

[iBrian]

Indeed - there is nothing wrong with accepting many possibilities and other opinions. And I agree that is a good thing to do so! But, ultimately, to exist within this world some form of decision has to be made by any of us on any of our actions - and it's not always a case of an action being simply "right" or "wrong" - as much as perhaps best, or most right, in those instances.

It is truly a shame when conflict occurs, and though it is worthwhile task to attempt to empathise and relate to another's opinion, and try to justify their position, actions, perception of ourselves - we must also remember not to take blame for such disagreements also entirely upon ourselves. I know of people who consider that it must be their fault if something happens to another - but there is danger is accepting responsibility not simply for the self, but also in accepting the responsibilities of others when none needs to be taken.

Perhaps we are both thinking of far too distant examples, and that there is something of the meaning and the message that has crossed - my apologies if this is the case.

 

[vitalsigns]

Perhaps we are both thinking of far too distant examples, and that there is something of the meaning and the message that has crossed - my apologies if this is the case.[/QUOTE]


There wasn't anything in your message that crossed mine. You simply filled in the gaps and gave me more to consider. Thank you for that.

As you said in your first reply, things simply cannot be seen in terms of black and white.

It reminds me of something that a friend pointed out to me sometime ago.

If we hold our hand in front of our face and are asked to say the first number that comes to mind, most of us will reply, "5" or "6" giving value to each finger and sometime to the hand as well. What most people don't consider are the empty spaces between the fingers. The number that will come to the mind of those who know the value of the empty spaces will say the number, "9."

Your response was a reminder that I overlooked the empty spaces.

Best regards,

VS

"He who loves discipline loves knowledge, but he who hates correction is foolish." Proverbs 12:1