8-limbed 2-headed sweatcreature


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Oregon coast

i can't speak for others
but i tend to have my surges of religious feeling
in periods of low libido

so , to me
the elephant in the room when talking about religion
the whale in the Sanctuary , as it were
is sex

the old New England church
at the beginning of John Huston's film-version of Moby Dick (1956)
this Congregationalist sanctuary feels like the bony-innards of a whale
a church erected upon the economics of the whale-hunt
in 19th-century New England , so that
the film-viewer feels like a latter-day Jonah

& the white whale of Herman Melville's story
is some type of sexual symbol , a force of nature
which Puritan economics is trying to destroy

the achieving of economic prosperity as
a kind of spiritual castration

as if a genuinely healthy sex-life
will have no need of religion

x y x y x y x y x y x y x y x y x y x y x y x y x y x y

strange year

while the rest of the USA has broiled in record-high spring/summer heat
the Pacific Northwest has remained abnormally cool
Portland not breaking into 80-degree temperatures till late July

the Oregon coast where i live rarely reaches into the 80s , anyway
even in a normally warm July/August for the Pacific Northwest
but last weekend the heat finally comes &
Portland tops the 90-degree mark , thrice
& the temp shows 85-Fahrenheit on my balcony thermometer , overlooking the Pacific Ocean
which is about as high as i ever remember seeing my thermometer go

no one (except hotels) here on the coast have built-in air-conditioning
& , as my father oft said
......a properly insulated house will never need it
......even a house unprotected from sunlight

Pa was big on a deep overhanging roof & foliage & other passive cooling-techniques
& 18 inches of insulation inside the roof

just finished selling the family home , up the coast a-ways
small & not particularly attractive to look at
needing a new composition roof & bolder hue of paint on the siding
but it will be as warm in winter & as cool in summer as u could want

both Pa (heart disease) then Ma (pneumonia) have died in the past 12 months
hold Ma's hand for her last 5 hours
rough year
my ex-roommate Betsy is currently out-west for a visit
which gives me some perspective

Betsy's seen duty in Iraq & Afghanistan
& i think in Somalia & other places she can't tell me about
so hot temperatures are nothing new to her

neither is being with people u care about , while they die

x y x y x y x y x y x y x y x y x y x y x y x y x y x y

i'm temperamentally heterosexual
but with Betsy i make an exception

Betsy is Buddhist
......i believe in nothing
she tells me , last weekend
......& this makes me happy

it is my day-off & , even with my 18-inches of insulation
my place bakes , reaching near 90-degrees indoors

Betsy & i lie naked on my futon all day long
sweat & talk , & talk & sweat
tangled in each others' limbs

sweating together
losing ourselves in each others' glands & skin
no longer 2 individuals , just
one big dumb/intelligent sweatcreature

& this helps me thru these days of pain & despair
& loss

to me there is Gyd & there is extinction
& both are equally real , each spiritually manifest

each , equally ego-free
each , an
8-limbed 2-headed sweatcreature

Dear Salishan,

Salishan said:
can't speak for others
but i tend to have my surges of religious feeling
in periods of low libido

so , to me
the elephant in the room when talking about religion
the whale in the Sanctuary , as it were
is sex

I think, to those of us raised in the Protestant tradition, wherein the word "church" evokes the smell of varnish on old church pews, the sound of pantyhose squishing on the large lady's thighs as she walks up the aisle, and the sight of black-robed preachers, like Ezra all those years before them, standing before the largely somber congregation and reading from the equally black-bound Book of the Law, that is to say, the Bible, it essentially boils down to this: physical orgasm is bad for the soul.


In my early '20's, I overheard what I considered an uproariously hilarious (at least I was amused) and insightful religious discussion, of a type, between my older (by 1 year) sister and my girlfriend, both of whom had, until recently, been off at a strict, religious boarding school. "It wasn't until I had my first orgasm," I overheard my sister say, "that I finally realized what it was that I had been praying for all along."

I laughed from the adjoining room. I do sometimes wonder, now some 30 years later, if Freud's thesis, that sexual (libidinal) repression is necessary in order for Civilization to exist, is not highly valid. Maybe we are all still living on the moral, spiritual and civilizational constructs of our sexually repressed great-grandparents. What I fear, then, is this: that what remains of Western Civilization will collapse if we stop building Cathedrals within which to pray and go off, instead, as sort of missionaries in reverse, in search of the g-spot.

My fears aside, may this year bring, for you, an upward turn in the Wheel of Fortuna!



exquisite creature

throughout my promiscuous 20s
i have lain around naked with many a boy
talking & talking
but i will not sleep with him
till i (with certitude) feel his ego drop away

the utter selfishness of orgasm
(fornication as sport)
is not what sex is about , for me

that kind of "selfishness" may well be the bane of civilization
as Freud suggests , the height of sinfulness
as Catholicism (& much of Protestantism) assumes

but , to me
moral & spiritual feelings (the base of religion) are virtually identical to the
generous-interpersonal & expansive-physical sensations which i experience
during egoless sex

as if meaningful sex is an early software , the primordial template
(a trial run)
for genuine religion

the real (the ultimate underlying) G-spot is

the puritanical prudishness of the US has affected so many negatively...from denying a generation of mothers the bonding with their children and that generation of children the benefit of breast milk....that over accentuation of the sexuality of breasts and nudity, to our current gender pref issues..

I'd like to say that I have sympathy for the loss in your life....and admiration how you are handling ALL of it.
Dear Salishan,

the real (the ultimate underlying) G-spot is

Good one (or should I say "g-spot" on)!

Given the self-confessional nature of this thread, let this be clear: it wasn't until after I had fornicated myself half-way around the globe and abominated myself all the way back that, in mid-life, I woke from an Ecstasy binge, reconsidered Freud's thesis, freaked out, and began wondering if, by so consistently not repressing my libido, I might have been contributing, in some strange way, to the collapse of one of my all-time favorite civilizations, the Western Civilization. Now I cannot enjoy sex without worrying, in the back of my mind, if, for instance, I might be in the process of endangering the Cathedral at Notre Dame.

But seriously, to modify Pink Floyd's lyric: "Shine on you blue diamond."