my special powers

william b

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I can detect when an enlightened person signs on the internet....to date, no enlightened person ever has.
 
My special powers are relentless ranting.

Other people get tired of ranting. I don't.

I could fill the whole forum with rants. I simply choose not to do it.
 
my special powers include talking absolute crap, about stuff I know nothing about which is everything really.
 
The five planeteers had special powers and when they were combined, they became Captain Planet.

So what do we get when we all combine our special powers? Captain Forum?

Who are the villains who pollute the forums?

enlightenment fanatics?
 
My special powers:

Invisibility
Telepathy
Intuitive Comprehension
Predicting stop lights
Super hearing
Electric thoughts
Melting obstacles
Seeing in the dark
Can change my size and density
Flying reindeer
Looking good in red and white
Consuming infinite milk and cookies
 
Flying reindeer
Looking good in red and white
Consuming infinite milk and cookies

going down chimneys
inhaling soot, breathing carbon monoxide fumes and not dying
looking clean and healthy after going down the chimney
not being burnt by the fire
 
He just shows up and takes the credit. He has honed and escalated his organization and delegation skills to a level of consciousness where it appears that he has accomplished much, assists in everything, yet does very little. What little he does he does well, he also has an amazing skill of thinking on his seat, diverting blame or making mountains out of mole hills, depending on the situation. No one knows exactly why he is involved, but he is believed to be invaluable to the process.
 
i have a mutant healing factor and an adamantite laced skeletal structure....

my friends call me.....






















The Marmoset!
 
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