New and a bit desperate

[wil]

please don't take this the wrong way, but could it be you're not looking for advice at all, but rather seeking approval for something you already know the answer to?

Lol....wow.... is that not what we are all here for?? Please raise your hand if you wish someone to tell you your current beleifs, religion and G!d are wrong. Anyone? Bueller?

 

[wil]

The best I can say is, be careful. Weigh all of the pros and cons and consider every eventuality. Even the ones you are sure won't happen. That is, consider the consequences should any of the concerns raised here come to pass and decide if the risk is worth it.

Now I can't get out of bed.

 

[A Cup Of Tea]

Yes, I figured that that would be helpful for us so I asked for a meeting with one of the nicest preachers I know (i’m not sure if preacher is the correct therm, in my branch of Christianity we have our own name’s and I know them in Dutch, but I’ve talked to one of the men who are ‘leading’ or ‘guiding’ a group or congregation.) He had some really nice scriptures for me but all where pointing in the direction of breaking up with my partner. I did not think of that as a bad think because I assume that he wants to follow the rules of the Bible and wants the help the rest to follow them as well, so I’ve thought the scriptures over in my head and thanked him for his council. Later I found out that my dad, who’s also a preacher, heard everything from his fellow-preacher. Even tho I thought I told it in private. So, I’m not really daring to ask a preacher in my surroundins again, because that will go to my dad as well. I’ve tried to contact some persons trough the internet and special Facebook pages, but I did not really found where I was looking for.

I’ve asked my partner to contact a Imam, but his family is very prominent to. And he does not dare to go to his own. I actually don’t know if he’ve talked to one for himself. Kind of feel like that’s a private thing and if he does not want to share I should not push him.

I’ve signed up to some forums about interfaith relationships and marriage, but those groups are often very closed. They did not really let somebody in if they did not know them. Maybe I should try different forums or something like that.

Have you considered asking advice at a local church from another denomination. There is still a great deal of overlap between different denominations and you can probably identify is they reason outside your own tradition. (Look away Thomas) I feel inclined to point out that, after several years on this site, if I have a theological question I go to Thomas here on this site. He has a degree and it shows. He is also a very considerate person...

perhaps the reason you've turned to outside sources for advice and or approval is that in your heart of hearts, you see them too. Otherwise, there would be no question in your mind.

I disagree with this. A person can seek advice on decisions with very high stakes no matter which way they lean. I don't think anyone here knows more of her heart of hears than her.

 

[Namaste Jesus]

I disagree with this. A person can seek advice on decisions with very high stakes no matter which way they lean.

Point taken and I agree. Just speaking in terms of the vibe I'm getting here.

I don't think anyone here knows more of her heart of hears than her.

I agree with you here as well. Didn't mean to imply otherwise. That's why I also said in the same post you quoted, "As much as others may want what is best for you, when it comes right down to it, only you know what that is."

 

[Lyari]

Lyari, please don't take this the wrong way, but could it be you're not looking for advice at all, but rather seeking approval for something you already know the answer to? I've been on the planet for quite a while now and I can tell you first hand, the heart is a very powerful motivator, but one that can easily cloud our judgment. Lyari, from what I've read here, I believe the warning signs are there and that perhaps the reason you've turned to outside sources for advice and or approval is that in your heart of hearts, you see them too. Otherwise, there would be no question in your mind.

I see the problems and not only in my heart. Life with my partner is full of insecurities and questions while I leave a live which I know and love. But I’m not willing to let my partner go or let my family go without a lot of meditation. They both deserve that. At the end, I want to make a decision with my whole mind and/or heart. That’s the only way I could stick to the decision I make, or that’s what I think.

Thank you for your further help. I’m weighing my options and I try to be careful. I think that my partner, my parents and my brother deserve that.

Have you considered asking advice at a local church from another denomination. There is still a great deal of overlap between different denominations and you can probably identify is they reason outside your own tradition. (Look away Thomas) I feel inclined to point out that, after several years on this site, if I have a theological question I go to Thomas here on this site. He has a degree and it shows. He is also a very considerate person...

No, I did not consider that but it sounds like a very good idea for me. I ‘ve searched for bible advice in my own denomination and I found a lot of scriptures and texts I would like to discuss with somebody.