I would especially like to hear from liberal or secular Jews.
them's fightin' words, NaN!
i actually would say that it's not really legitimate for you to say "if non-orthodox, why?" - a lot of jews, as you very well know, have been brought up non-orthodox and that's normal for them. it was normal for me. i opted *in*, but on my own terms. and this:
What is it that causes you to reject Rabbinical Judaism?
is tendentious to a degree. back when i was in the (UK) reform, i didn't "reject rabbinical judaism", nor was i taught to. there was what my family did and what other families did and what people who were "orthodox" did. it was just how things appeared to be. everyone justifies themselves in their own way. your question implies that you consider that the "state of modern judaism" is largely because people aren't
frum enough. i don't think that's the problem - or at least i don't think it's the biggest problem. you are essentially assuming that orthodoxy doesn't have to explain itself, when, in the open competition obtaining in the ideas market, it manifestly does.
you are obviously concerned about assimilation (as am i) and see intermarriage as a factor - as, also, do i. however, it may surprise you to hear that in my experience, what causes people to reject mainstream orthodoxy is the difficulty of conversion (for those in relationships with non-jews) and the general small-mindedness, closed-mindedness, parochialism and intolerance displayed by many who are supposedly orthodox or representatives of orthodoxy. i can tell you about two women of my experience who would have had orthodox conversions if the beit din had not been so
machmir. what i am saying is that effectively, nowadays, there is more or less a dialogue of the deaf. if orthodoxy doesn't compete, it cannot complain about not winning. if it doesn't explain itself and reach out to those it prefers to exclude and excoriate, it has only itself to blame for not being able to communicate with those outside it.
my own experience is as someone who has chosen of my own free will to accept the binding of halacha and that which is implicit in
Torah miSinai. my entry into this world has come at considerable cost and through considerable emotional pain. at every step, whenever i have come into contact with the official side of orthodoxy (at least the UK ashkenazic version of it) the experience has been exceedingly unpleasant. the beit din seems determined to punish people for the supposed sins of their parents or grandparents. it is all very well wringing your hands over how terrible assimilation and intermarriage is, but you have to offer an alternative. modern orthodoxy has to be modern as well as orthodox, not just continually kowtow to the haredi world. this is one of the reasons i'm so glad i had the sephardi route open to me.
so, how do i feel about assimilation? unsurprised. what would i do about it? attract people to *learn* - and not by giving supposed answers, like kiruv organisations like aish ha-torah and the jewish learning exchange, but by stimulating brains as well as hearts. limmud (
http://www.limmud.org) is one excellent approach that i wholeheartedly recommend to counter assimilation. similarly, i recommend the "thinking person's orthodoxy", as exemplified by yakar (
http://www.yakar.org.uk) and other such excellent groups, communities and movements that exist, such as yitz greenberg's "klal" in north america.
how do i feel about intermarriage? i think we need to be more realistic about it and, certainly where the mother is halachically jewish, ensure that the door remains open. this will only be done if the children of such a relationship feel that they can still become halachically observant without disrespecting their father.
b'shalom
bananabrain