Polygamy and Monogamy

Friend

Friend

In the Name of God
Messages
603
Reaction score
3
Points
18
Location
Jordan
Hi to all CR members & visitors

Among the numerous misconceptions about Islam, is that it is the only religion that permits polygamy, and that Muslims are the only people who might practice it. On the contrary, polygamy was never prohibited in Judaism and Christianity, until a few centuries ago. Besides the fact that most of the prophets mentioned in the Old Testament were polygamous - both Jews and Christians practiced polygamy throughout a long period of their history. However, when examining the teachings of both faiths, neither Christianity nor Judaism provided clear guidelines and regulations in regards to this practice.

In Christianity: As the Old Testament is a vital part of the Christian faith, it cannot be disregarded in this discussion. It was concerning the Old Testament laws and the Old Testament Prophets that Jesus (P.) said plainly that he came not to destroy the Law or the Prophets but rather to fulfill. In addition, there is no passage in the New Testament that clearly prohibits polygamy. This was the understanding of the early Church Fathers and for several centuries in the Christian era.

In Judaism: It is notable that most of the Old Testament Prophets were polygamous. According to the Old Testament, Abraham “the friend of God” had more than one wife, David had one hundred wives, and Solomon is even said to have had 700 wives and 300 concubines.
In contrast with Judaism and Christianity, Islam dealt with polygamy more clearly. It provides legal requirements that restrain it, to a certain extent and this amounted to the discouragement of practicing polygamy.

I want to ask members here ...What do you think about this issue ??:confused:


Thanks to all
 
Marriage is a religious institution and as such it can take whatever form the governing religion chooses.

No one has accused islam of anything here today and yet you are defending it anyway.

Seems to me that you, Friend, are ashamed that your religion permits polygamy.
 
Hi

Awaiting_the_fifth, I think the marriage institution in Islam give a logic solution
to many families and societies problems
 
Hello Friend

Polygamy......

It is a case of Jehovah (Yahweh) God allowing the practice of polygamy to take place. Tolerating the wrongs of man. Polygamy was by no means a written law made by God. He did not institutionalise it, or neither did he wholely agree upon it, and it never has been his absolute law, or never did it come to his mind to make it his rule. His standards about one man for one woman did not change and have never changed. This can be seen by the fact that Jesus regenerated the concept of the monogamous law, found in Genesis, as it is also found in the new testament in the gospel of Matthew (below.)


The original rule regarding the bonding of one man and woman within the bible is found in Genesis 2:24
"That is why a man will leave his father and his mother and he must stick to his wife and they must become ONE flesh......
It was always one man for one woman. It is only men defying Gods law as written in the new and old testament that make polygamy seem like God made it his doctrine......Polygamy started with the boastful (pre flood) Lamech, and not with the followers of God or by God.


A similar case to polygamy is shown by looking at adultery. God despises adultery, but on occasions he has allowed it. Sometimes he will allow a bending of his rules if it helps a progression of his purpose. A case in point is King David, God allowed King David to get off relatively lightly for his commiting of a sin...adultery. At that time adultery was punishable by death. Yet David was protected. Though his life was a misery thereafter.


David was of the lineage of Adam through Noah, Jacob etc. carrying the seed right up to Jesus. Because of this, Jehovah God had to protect this lineage. Similarly, along this line of descendency we find Abraham. He took another woman, not strictly a marriage partner, but he had relations with his 'slave' girl Hagar. Sarah, his wife, wanted this because she was barren.
She invoked an ancient custom whereby a substitute woman was involved to help produce a child for a woman that could not have one. She wanted this so as to produce a son to continue the lineage. God had promised a seed to Abraham... A son that would produce many. I'm sure that you are aware of this.
When God dealt with the post-Flood patriarchs he had not yet given extensive laws on human behavior, including marriage. By time God accepted Israel as his people, polygamy had already found its way into the life of some of the Israelites, so God tolerated it, but made it clear to his followers that monogamy was the original rule.


Both of these instances above involved Gods servants defying his law, but to protect the lineage God allowed it. However there are other instances of polygamy regarding Gods followers e.g. Gideon, Solomon etc. Usually these were the ruling classes and the wealthy who took wives and concubines. It was warned against in the scrolls of the old testament...Deutronomy 17:17 "He should also not multiply wives for himself, that his heart may not turn aside; nor should he increase silver and gold for himself very much." Clearly the old testaments writings did not agree with polygamy.


In nearly all occurences of scriptural polygamy, trouble followed. Moses recalls: "My father had five wives and much trouble because the women were constantly fighting and trying to harm one another !" Polygamy though was not practiced by the majority of ancient Israel.


All throughout biblical history the Israelites proved to be unfaithful to Jehovah God. He allowed their defiance of his laws because of the need to protect the seed, done by protecting the nation, as you said, it led up to the point to Jesus, to "fulfill the law". The coming of the messiah was paramount. He was to die so that his death would buy back the perfection that we had lost from Adam...perfect man for perfect man. Known as the ransom sacrifice. That is why polygamy and other sins in the old testament were reluctantly accepted, to a certain extent. Adultery, polygamy and divorce (on any grounds) are wrong in Gods eyes, but were merely tolerated by Him.


Regarding the new testament you say that there is no scripture that prohibits polygamy. There are a number of them. A scripture found in Matthew made it clear regarding adultery and extra marital relations (that encompasses polygamy.) In the words of Jesus.....

Matthew 19: 6-8 "So that they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore, what God has yoked together let no man put apart." 7 They said to him: "Why, then, did Moses prescribe giving a certificate of dismissal and divorcing her?" 8 He said to them: "Moses, out of regard for your hardheartedness, made the concession to you of divorcing your wives, but such has not been the case from [the] beginning. 9 I say to you that whoever divorces his wife, except on the ground of fornication, and marries another commits adultery."


The religious leaders at the time tested Jesus, trying to catch him out.This scripture shows that God, the maker of laws, in the past made a concession for divorce, and likewise he made a concession regarding polygamy. God tolerated both practices. It also shows that there was always only one means of divorce... on the grounds of adultery. Immediately another wife is taken (polygamy) the sin of adultery has been commited. Polygamy is therefore a wrong practice in Christianity and recognised as such in the new testament.

​
Looking at Matthew 19:5.... "And said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and his mother and will stick to his wife, and the two will be one flesh’ Jesus is reminding us (and the religious leaders of the time) about the original law regarding marriage. He is quoting Genesis.....
Genesis 2:24 "That is why a man will leave his father and his mother and he must stick to his wife and they must become one flesh."
Plainly Jesus was directing his followers to return to God’s original way for human marriage, a man’s having only one living wife. Because Jesus came to fulfil the law, he was fulfilling it by bringing back the original meaning of Gods law regarding marriage. Jesus was given the right to give us new commandments and to bring back the original rules as commandments.


Also the apostle Paul under Gods inspiration backed up monogamy in 1 Corinthians 7:2..."Yet, because of prevalence of fornication, let each man have his own wife and each woman have her own husband.
Furthermore the standard required by overseers in Christian congregations are spelled out in 1 Timothy 3:2 . " The overseer should therefore be irreprehensible, a husband of one wife, moderate in habits, sound in mind, orderly, hospitable, qualified to teach.....
>>One wife. One husband<< Monogamy is a tenet in the new testament.

Don't get me wrong, I do not look down on the Quran, I only have a little knowledge of it, and I have a question .....Is it true that because of large numbers of widows that were left after various battles, the Quran made room for polygamy ?.........

"And if ye fear that ye will not deal fairly by the orphans, marry of the women, who seem good to you, two or three or four; and if ye fear that ye cannot do justice (to so many) then one (only) or (the captives) that your right hands possess." (Surah 4:3,MMP )

I guess that there is a deeper meaning to this.

​
 
Polygyny had its use in the past when husbands where dying in combats, leaving their wife alone with the childrens. But today, I personnaly think it has lost its practical use.

If 3-4+ people want to live their life in a polygamous/polyamorous relationship, they should be open to both polyandry and polygyny. Otherwise, it doesn't take count of the equality of women in society.
___
Kal
 
Although I am not for polygamy, I think it should be legal. As long as the man treats all his women with equal it is alright.

Our species evolved into a monogamous species around the time of Homo Habilis and Homo Erectus. At this time early hominids started to recognize one mate for life, although this wasn't a rule. But over time mankind did adapt to only having one partner, and not until civilization arose did men start to have more than one wife.

However I do not think Nature intended Homo Sapiens to have more than one main partner. I think Nature did permit humans to have sex outside of marriage as long as each spouse knows about it but in general man has always been a monogamous species, at least leaning toward that side more;).
 
Silverbackman said:
Although I am not for polygamy, I think it should be legal. As long as the man treats all his women with equal it is alright.

Our species evolved into a monogamous species around the time of Homo Habilis and Homo Erectus. At this time early hominids started to recognize one mate for life, although this wasn't a rule. But over time mankind did adapt to only having one partner, and not until civilization arose did men start to have more than one wife.

However I do not think Nature intended Homo Sapiens to have more than one main partner. I think Nature did permit humans to have sex outside of marriage as long as each spouse knows about it but in general man has always been a monogamous species, at least leaning toward that side more;).
Click to expand...

When you say that polygamy should be made legal I suppose you mean that both polygyny and polyandry should be made legal right? ;)
 
Don't get me wrong, I do not look down on the Quran, I only have a little knowledge of it, and I have a question .....Is it true that because of large numbers of widows that were left after various battles, the Quran made room for polygamy ?.........



"And if ye fear that ye will not deal fairly by the orphans, marry of the women, who seem good to you, two or three or four; and if ye fear that ye cannot do justice (to so many) then one (only) or (the captives) that your right hands possess." (Surah 4:3,MMP )​
Click to expand...

Hi/ all
E99,,thanks for your nice reply. you should know that it is prefer in Islam for man to have one wife but if he want to have another wife and he have the ability to do that he can.

004.003 "If ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans, Marry women of your choice, Two or three or four; but if ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one, or (a captive) that your right hands possess, that will be more suitable, to prevent you from doing injustice."



yes ,, these are one of many reasons that encourage muslims to have more than one wife ,,it is more acceptable to have more than one wife from having forbidder relationships .also ,if he want to have children and his wife can't do that he can marry another wife and keep his relation with his previous wife .
and there are another reasons for problems... polygamy is the best solution for it .
 
I think polygamy provides a last-resort solution to many problems. To undertsand that you have to think of polygamy from a society's point of view and not from a man's point of view...

What comes to mind when we think polygamy is a middle-aged man marrying a young woman as a second wife (and that doesn't feel quite fair to the first wife) but if polygamy was a part of a social-support structure then it makes sense I think...

Think of the second wife being, a disabled person, a very poor woman in need of support, a blind woman, basically a woman who will have a hard time marrying on her own... Islam believes that women of such qualities have the same rights in support, protection and satisfaction that comes with marriage as any other woman. Realistically speaking, not too many men would want to spend their life with one and only woman who for example needs special care, can't bear kids, is somehow dis-advantaged! so there comes another chance for these women to actually have a ligitimate family structure and the help and protection of a man... When you think about such scenario, you have think outside your local community (New York in my case) Islam is a world religion applicable anytime, anywhere.... so it has to work in Afganistan and it has to work in London... Being a matter of personal choice and more of a community standard, I guess polygamy would be more in prospective inside each society and it's special needs... Even on a temporarry basis (after an earthquake or a natural change in the society's demography for example)

Even for women who were just plain unlucky in finding a partner, this is a second chance kinnda thing. Islam would rather have 100% of the population satisfied sexually, financially, and in having a family... It doesn't want 80% to be happy and the rest 20% can just suck it up.

That goes for everything in islam, you cannot sleep on a full stomache when you know your neighbor is starving.. you are not allowed to. By the same token you cannot enjoy the family life when you know your neighbor is suffering in lonliness... most suiside cases come from people who just didn't find support... That how I think about it...
I'm not for plygamy (personally) but If my wife and I agree that there is a woman who is in need of such things... support, a house, a family life...and we can agree on terms then I wuold choose to do it (not at all for sexuall reasons) but I guess just like you give charity in money, you might have to give charity in more valuable things... time, love, support, protection...
Obviously the charity would be from both the husband and the wife, each giving up some convinience to help another.

Also, polygamy in Islam is subject to the Islam way of life... In Islam a woman never have to make a penny in her life if she so chooses... she is guaranteed food, clothes and shelter wheather married or not (father, brother, husband or closset male relative) are OBLIGATED to support this woman... even if she chooses to work, that doesn't waive her rights in the above... meaning she can make her own money, but she doesn't have to spend it on anything... a man on the other hand, is told how to spend his money (in part on her)
So it doesn't worl the other way around... a man have to go out and work to support himself, not woman is ever obligated to.

Just my 2 cents :)
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top