The biggest problem with "church" is that church can be a place where an individual gets abused for whatever they are doing that isnt "perfect", whether it is because you are gay, fat, not rich enough, not available enough, etc.
But it is interesting to notice that alot of neo-pagan movements are higher on the "gay" numbers, and I was under the impression that this was because neo-paganism had a different basis for morality than the western religions had. Whenever I visit a neo-pagan sight, I seem to come across alot of things that Christianity would frown on deeply about sexual issues - group sex has come up, trading partners has come up, being ok with same-sex relationships, and "feminist" issues in goddess worship. I would think that people who have these lifestyles for what ever reason would want to gather with people they could share their experiences with on an equal basis, for the same reason that when I had small kids I didn't really want to hang out with people in their "40's" because we had nothing in common, and now that I am in my 40's and my kids are older, I really cringe at having to hang out with people who have young kids - been there, done that, don't want to re-experience that again, sort of thing. I also noticed that for myself, I am not "attracted" to tv shows that display lifestyles I am not experiencing, even though I have tried to watch and understand them in order to be "fair" and see if they have any value - for example, I used to just love to watch that show "A Different World" about African American kids that went off to college. I am not Black, but I heavily identified with their problems because I was a college student, and even though I was married, and most of the characters were not, they still had alot of problems and challenges I identified with. I also Identified with the Cosby Show, because of the "family" experiences it presented and, though not Black, I did have a family. But the new African American Show about 3 single girls, I don't really feel attracted to that show because I don't have their problems. Same situation with Ellen DeGeneres' show that made homosexuality jokes that was removed from the air - I think the ratings went down because the major population is not gay, and simply did not understand the jokes. I know that I did not understand them, and found my self saying, "hm, wonder what was funny about that..." and trying to figure it out for the next few days. Her humor about things that applied to me were indeed funny. And like now I watch Seinfeld, which I love, and I don't know why I identify with it, maybe because the characters get themselves into so much trouble which I find myself doing, while Friends is more about relationships with singles, which I, as a married person do not experience. I think that gay people just need other gay people to interface with about their specific problems, and no matter how empethetic I am, I can not identify with those problems and have never experienced them. This brings us to Church again - there are no "gay" support groups that I know of in most churches. There used to not be divorce support groups either, or unwed mom support groups, alcohol/addiction groups, etc, but that has changed. I think that alot of people still believe superstitions about gay people, like that they might just actually be pedofiles (I have no idea why straight people believe this, but I have heard it before, several times), or that gays will try to teach children that it is ok to experiment with being gay, when parents want their children to not consider that lifestyle in a church setting especially. So there is alot of fear that "the gay people will run away with my children" sort of thing going on. If I were gay, I'd be offended by all this and start my own group! And I think that is what should happen - gay Christians have their trials to stop their sins, whatever they are just like everyone in Christendom does. They need to have congregations where they can feel accepted and get support for their problems. Christianity is a long way from yielding to this need, so people are seeking help in other religions. Unfortunately Islam prob. does not offer this type of support, and neither does the strict portions of Judaism, so what is a person to do? You end up choosing the alternative lifestyle not only in sex, but in religion as well, what else can you do? To me being anti-gay at church is exactly like being anti-smoker, anti-teen pregnancy, anti-divorce, and all these things happen to people who attend church. While the Bible teaches against such things (for our own good), it does not condemn anyone to hell who believes in Christ, no matter what he or she has done or is doing. Christ will "fix" everyone to perfect in heaven. Until then, we just have to accept ourselves as unperfect, and we are all unperfect.