What is your mother's name?

This is an unfortunate piece of Arabic (predominantly) culture. And part of a large problem that makes discussing our faith in larger circles difficult... It is so indoctrinated into Arabic culture that women are lesser. and therefore to be called in association to a woman is now an insult. Same would be to ask a man (his Wife's name) husband. It is almost exclusively the man and his wife... for example "Ali and his wife are coming to dinner" Ali in this case could be the speaker's daughter's husband.
 
It is not just Arabic culture. Once upon the time women took their husbands name and became the 'ne' - alas my mother, since my father had a doctorate of law, she proudly called herself - dr. xxx.yyyy-ne - nobody forced her, mind you...but it was the cultural norm. In the US with the feminist movement, sadly women have to earn their own doctorate..
 
To me it looked like there is a change afoot... women's rights are hard to get going until electricity and washing machines are in most homes...

But....receiving a doctorate without earning it....is not a doctorate. Surely you are joking.
 
I was no joking but making a point. She could call herself her husband i.e. name, title etc. Of course she was not a doctor but she was a doctor's wife!
wil said:
To me it looked like there is a change afoot... women's rights are hard to get going until electricity and washing machines are in most homes...

But....receiving a doctorate without earning it....is not a doctorate. Surely you are joking.
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a. what is 'ne'
b. I have no issues with someone being Mrs Dr Smith.. but calling someone by a title (other than honorary) that they haven't earned makes no sense to me.
 
By the way, it is impossible to ask "what is your first name?" in Chinese. The term "first name" or "given name" is untranslatable into Chinese.
 
Tea Xiānsheng!

No, they do not. Xing means last name (family name) and mingzi refers to full name (first and last name). The only way to accurately ask a Chinese person their "first name" is to ask, "what are the second and third Chinese characters of your name?".
 
wil said:
a. what is 'ne'
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It's 'née', from the French naitre 'to be born'. It's used to indicate the maiden name of a married woman, and is now widely used to imply 'formerly known as'. So if Jane Smith marries John Jones, she's Jones née Smith.

wil said:
b. I have no issues with someone being Mrs Dr Smith
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I'm not sure that's correct usage, it's a bit tricky. (Correct Brit-English usage, I should say.) Mr, Mrs, Dr etc are titles, and you only have one, so "Mrs Dr Smith" would mean the wife of Dr Smith. If Mrs Smith is a Dr, then she's Dr Smith.

wil said:
but calling someone by a title that they haven't earned makes no sense to me.
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I think it's a bit naughty ... It's a bit like me saying 'I'm Mr Professor Smith' because my wife is a Professor? In fact calling oneself 'Dr Smith' because one's husband is a doctor is illegal.

Interestingly, I once worked with a guy who used to answer the phone and say "Jones." I thought it a bit off-haned, but it turns out that any title is honorary, offered out of respect. So you answer the phone and say 'Jones speaking' and the other says, 'Mr Jones ... ' You should never introduced yourself as 'Mr Jones' in polite company. The Brit way to do it is 'The name's Jones', 'Good morning, Mr Jones', 'Ah, it's Dr Jones, actually', 'Oh, I do apologise, Dr Jones,' 'That's quite all right' ... LOL

... and so it goes on. Today one can address a male person as 'esquire', but never with 'Mr', so it's 'Mr Tom Jones' or 'Tom Jones esq.' ... all these rules of social etiquette were invented, I'm sure, to trip up those who don't know how the play the game ...

I once did a spell as a cab driver. I had two passengers, one was a Lord and the other was his chauffeur. It seems Lord Whatever insisted his chauffeur joined in him his celebration, and they were as drunk as newts, so they abandoned the Bentley ... on the way the chauffeur kept apologising, saying, "I'm sorry, Sir Lord ...' until the other said, "For God's sake, it's either Sir Peter or Lord Whatever. Stop calling me 'Sir Lord'." Their conversation was really funny.
 
Thomas said:
... and so it goes on. Today one can address a male person as 'esquire', but never with 'Mr', so it's 'Mr Tom Jones' or 'Tom Jones esq.' ... all these rules of social etiquette were invented, I'm sure, to trip up those who don't know how the play the game ...
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While we brought with us the 'formal' language it didn't take us long to bastardize it. Of course y'all made some change too :) Today in US Esquire is reserved for the title given to one who passes the Bar and is an attorney. Many still refer to the English Gentleman as Squire! We can of course tear the language to shreds...I certainly am guilty...

NOTE: On second thought I used the "we" loosely. My ancestors are Irish. We butchered the language from the beginning :)
 
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Hermes said:
It is not just Arabic culture. Once upon the time women took their husbands name and became the 'ne' - alas my mother, since my father had a doctorate of law, she proudly called herself - dr. xxx.yyyy-ne - nobody forced her, mind you...but it was the cultural norm. In the US with the feminist movement, sadly women have to earn their own doctorate..
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That is a scary darn custom.... but back to the topic... the video.... can anyone discuss from personal knowledge?
 
This is cultural, not Islamic/Muslim issue. For example, in Nepal it is disrespectful to call one's mother by name. You call her Mother. I grew up in a Muslim family all my life and we never had such issues. Even in the old days women still had their names by which they were known for.
 
I have no clue. But, I suspect that Mother is a highly regarded title in a family and such the woman who is the mother is very respected.
 
I think it is ridiculous. Why would mother's name be shameful, bring shame to the family? Obviously, this type of sexism is rooted in something else other than the religion of Islam because mother does not bring shame to her children or her family according to Islam. In fact, Messenger Muhammad pbuh was quoted to have said:

"A man came to the Prophet and said, ‘O Messenger of God! Who among the people is the most worthy of my good companionship? The Prophet said: Your mother. The man said, ‘Then who?' The Prophet said: Then your mother. The man further asked, ‘Then who?' The Prophet said: Then your mother. The man asked again, ‘Then who?' The Prophet said: Then your father. (Bukhari, Muslim)."

"Your Heaven lies under the feet of your mother. (Ahmad, Nasai)"

Why would someone who is so important have a "shameful" name?. Shame on the men in the video for behaving in such a way. One can only imagine what they do to their mothers and other women when they feel that mother's name is something that must not be uttered to strangers.

We know our Muslim Mothers from history and two of the most beloved are:

Khadīja b. Khuwaylid--the first wife of Messenger Muhammad pbuh.

‘Ā’isha b. Abī Bakr --one of the other Messenger's pbuh wives, considered one of the first scholars of Islam as many hadiths are attributed to her and many people looked up to her for advice on the practice of Islam.


 
nothing wrong in not saying one's mothers name; the most closest we can be to our mother is when we call the intimate special call just reserved for her; mum; mummy; mommy, etc, and this is enough; outsiders don't have any business to demand to know someone's mothers name!
 
Ahmad232, but why? So, when you find yourself in a situation to have to introduce your mother to, say, your fiance, do you just say: "this is mother." Doesn't she have a name? How awkward would that be if you introduced all present with their names except your mother? I do not understand that mentality. Plus, there is no prohibition for telling someone your mother's name in the Noble Qur'an and Messenger Muhammad pbuh never encouraged such practice. Isn't Jesus pbuh known as Son of Mariam (Mary)? What, would Allah SWT just give him the title of Son of mother, then? Mary a.s. was an honorable woman, so why not let people know her name. Same as your mother. I am sure she is a very nice lady.
 
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