My answer would be yes, Buddhists could easily accept that
part of our experiences after death include:
A) Some degree of experiences in one of the hell realms, or in what Tibetan Buddhists call pretaloka (the world of "hungry ghosts," where existence is characterized by extreme hunger or thirst - not for food, but simply in the sense of feeling unfulfilled, clumsy as that sounds) ... and
B) Also some degree of experiences as a Deva, or a sojourn through what some branches of Buddhism call The Pure Land (blissful, heavenly, but in & of itself not permanent).
Either way, and regardless, the experiences after death can be quite hellish ... but usually only for those who have lived extremely wickedly - and are thus destined to exhaust their negative karma. This is
not punishment, it is simply the
Law of Cause and Effect ("as ye sow, so shall ye reap").
For most of us, being unenlightened, but
hopefully not particularly wicked, we might become very disoriented as we pass over, becoming caught up in many of the
lesser lights as described in the Tibetan Buddhist
Bardo Thodol (Book of the Dead). But again, this is
not permanent - since the
causes which generate our afterlife experiences
are themselves, temporal & limited.
Ego definitely "loosens," or wanes, in the afterlife experiences - no matter what branch or sect of Buddhism one believes in. The very
idea or notion of ego is, itself, regarded as but one of the many thoughts that occupy our attention during incarnation (made strong by
self-cherishing). If we have a strong ego, we might, indeed, have a bit of a hard time as we sojourn through the bardo. But this is all for a purpose, and the happy result is that we "lighten our load," so to speak ... and return to a new birth
free of much of the baggage that we might otherwise have accumulated (
had ego been permitted to continue bloating).
So even ego-death, which is destined to occur following each earthly incarnation, is
not regarded as inherently negative by Buddhists who understand the reasons for this (the natural effects of the Law of Karma, or rather, of our
actions according to this law). Yes, there can be unpleasantness,
but it's our own doing! And
that's why we return to a new incarnation ... with the same
skandhas (personality tendencies, qualities, etc.) which we left the last life with -
hopefully a bit improved.
It's not that the slate is wiped
utterly clean each time, else rebirth
would truly be meaningless. It's our outer memory, our recollection, and yes - our personal ego - which doesn't carry over. However, the
sense of ego ... does most certainly return (mmmm .... case in point, yours, mine, etc.). After all, Buddhists maintain that our `true identity' rests much more deeply - within our
Buddha nature - and does not (ever) permanently reside in mind, emotional states, body, etc. So for the person who really likes ego, and doesn't want to let go of it, a Buddhist would simply try and help such a person to understand that
ego is not the Self (not Buddha nature), and therefore they are clinging to an illusion (in the sense that it
isn't meant to be permanent, not that it doesn't exist at all).
I may get slapped on the wrist a bit (since I'm not a practicing Buddhist), but this is my understanding. The closest that my exoteric beliefs come to any faith/religion/tradition ... is Tibetan Buddhism and the Egyptian tradition. So I hope that helps ...
andrew