Are we too nice?

Are we too nice?

  • Yes

    Votes: 5 55.6%

  • No

    Votes: 4 44.4%
  • Total voters
    9
  • Poll closed .
i think I have to side with 17th here, when he mentions hypocrites. A lot of ppl "play" nice, but nice is not what they are, in truth. Instead, people seem to play games, and how nice they are to you depends on your and their status, and any gains or losses that might be made as a result.

I do think, though, that people in general are "too nice". They are desperate not to offend, desperate to appear equinanimous, and so desperate for others not to view them as twi/ats that they have no honesty left. I feel that, while there are many people in the world who I do not agree with, at least they have the courage of their convictions, and to me, that's worth something more than agreeableness is...
 
Vajradhara said:
i have the feeling that many, many beings mistake being open minded, knowledgeable and understanding appreciation of another viewpoint implies a tacit accord or acceptance of said view and the corollary to that is the idea that if you don't agree with a view that you don't understand it. such thinking couldn't be more wrongheaded.
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I couldn't agree more (oh the irony). As we all have our own nuanced views it is hardly surprising that we do not all agree on everything 100% and yet failure to utter any sort of divergance from an expressed opinion seems to be taken as tacit agreement. I'm interested in the views of others, they may sometimes influence me, but I'm not about to split hairs or argue over every utterance made.

There are about 8 billion people in the world, each with a myriad of opinions. Much of our conflicts (personal and inter-national) arise from such "differences", whether on trivia or greater issues. This is where our level of "niceness" gets us. Imagine (and it will just be imagine) a world where everyone was "nice" to each other. Who would fire the first weapon?

s.
 
Raksha said:
I read through a few of the first replies including yours and then clicked "Yes," so I'm the one who upset the balance.
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Raksha, the entire world has condoned me to read Terry Pratchet. In fact many people have told me to read him. One day about 10+ years ago I read through a picturebook about Discworld, so I can say I have yes read Terry Pratchet. He is a funny guy. Discworld sits upon the back of some sort of beast, a tortoise I think. Upsetting the balance would be the sort of thing to happen to his Discworld in the event that one of the sacred tortoise knees gave way, but that is about the only event in which that could occurr. I realize now we are not talking about balance on that grand of a scale, as I have no influence over the sacred tortoise knees. I cannot even affect the way those two words are spelled: tortoise, knee. TP is certainly a funny guy.

Raksha said:
When it comes to questions like the existence/non-existence of God, I am much more laid back and not dogmatic at all. I know what I believe, but I figure nobody can prove it one way or the other so it's not worth arguing about. So most of the time I go a lot easier on atheists than on biblical literalists.
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I'm in agreement with you here. One time on this site I lost my cool over this very issue and made some very hasty posts, which fortunately I was able to justify later.
 
There are two basic functions of human interaction: Status forcing, and face making. "Nice" is, for the most part, a sort of passive-aggressive, non-playing yet playing stance between these two dynamics.

Chris
 
Sam Albion said:
i think I have to side with 17th here, when he mentions hypocrites. A lot of ppl "play" nice, but nice is not what they are, in truth. Instead, people seem to play games, and how nice they are to you depends on your and their status, and any gains or losses that might be made as a result.

I do think, though, that people in general are "too nice". They are desperate not to offend, desperate to appear equinanimous, and so desperate for others not to view them as twi/ats that they have no honesty left. I feel that, while there are many people in the world who I do not agree with, at least they have the courage of their convictions, and to me, that's worth something more than agreeableness is...
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Well said that man.
 
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