OK Salty, first ok, I accept that you were speculating about a different kind of person. ( I too have learnt something, I didnt know that kind of personality existed.) so, Im sorry if I went off the handle at your posts. Lets build a bridge and get over it OK? Ive put my past way bedhind me and I am a new and improved person. so lets be friends. K?
Hey, grey. Where did you get the idea I was fighting you?
I was just saying what life was like for men, particularly the vulnerable type, which doesn't go into life purposely picking fights. If I was the predatorial type I would probably say a few things to "bash" women, but I was just telling you a few things about how "some" of us think so you can bond and connect with and understand us. Not trying to be predatorial there. We don't normally express ourselves much and I was just giving you a snapshot of what the life story of a man was like.
Of course, there was a bit of sensationalism and I might have been a bit "provocative" here and there. But it was meant to be more like a "friendly" way of describing how a man's life is like to me.
It's hard to make that known with electronic communication. How does one convey feeling in text?
I was afraid, at some point that you might have thought of me as one of those "male chest beaters" and seen me as one of the "unfriendly, predatorial" kind of man. I don't have much of a chest to beat, though. I don't talk about how "good" men are. I don't feel a need to compete with or control women. I'm quite happy letting women take control, as long as I can still realise my own dreams. I'm not at war with women. Women can get as much power and influence as they like. I'm only at war with people who hurt my feelings. But it's a defensive war. I don't attack them. It's more about being misunderstood and finding ways to deal with misunderstandings.
I'm not sure what impression you got of me out of all that. I just thought it might be interesting to tell my story. Hey, what picture did I paint?
lol yes. Love the white too!!!
I've got a question. Are wives allowed to " lightly beat " their husbands if they get out of line? Or do you just threaten to cut off sex and that is punishment enough?
I have never actually heard Muslims saying wives should "lightly beat" their husbands, though if there's nothing said about that, it's probably allowed. I heard once though, from a friend who had had a discussion with a Muslim one time, that a woman is supposed to agree to have sex with a man every time he asks for it.
My personal view on these two views (not to do with Islam) -- for non-Muslim/possibly Western couples; maybe those Muslims out there could use this for comparison:
Lightly beating your husband? I suppose examples might include slapping him in the face (to embarrass and disgrace him) or punching/smacking him in the shoulder (a reprimand). That's ok with me. I'm ok with women expressing anger and discontent. It's good for you women to assert yourselves. Just do it with love. If we're embarrassed or hurt we don't express it. That said, it's quite possible for you to do emotional damage without knowing it.
Most importantly, you don't have to treat us as evil, pompous and arrogant villains all the time. We don't see ourselves that way.
Cutting off sex? Probably not a good idea. A lot of men have an emotional need for sex. It's just something they've gotta have. Otherwise it just ruins their day. Punishment? That's obviously a way of "attacking" or "threatening" him. That's just going to make the relationship worse. You're trying to get something that you want by pounding someone into submission. If both people do this throughout a relationship, they're going to have a long history of unresolved pains and hurts.
This is what makes us predators. You attack the other person in some way and threaten them, knowing their weaknesses and what's important to them. It's either physical or emotional damage.
He could, eventually, get violent because of a lot of the pain welling up inside. Or worse still . . . cheat on you with another woman. A good way to sabotage a relationship. A benefit may be that it could set you free from the man you don't love anymore.
I guess we'll wait for the answers . . .
Until exactly one hour ago, I thought you were a man, Russky.
You thought she was a man? How could you?
Up until an hour ago I believed she was a woman. I had felt something faintly feminine in her posts until then. Something about the way madeinrussia expressed
its views. Then when I was reading the posts in this forum, wasn't so sure anymore. I think she started to become subtle there. She was curious. She knew her identity wasn't all that clear . . . so she decided to find out what we really thought. Yeah that game was fun. Can we play again?
But anyway . . . the name. Doesn't it sound like a name a girl would use?
I'm made in .......? Why would a man/boy say he's made in XXXX? That just sounds pansy.