There are a few posters like this so dont worry you arent the only one..
I hope I'm not one of them.
I am fairly devoted to the tradition of Christianity and consider myself to be a keeper of the traditions of Christianity, but not in the same way as the fundamentalists. I believe that fundamentalists can indeed have genuine faith, but I don't agree with their
representation of Christianity to outsiders as well as internally/domestically within their communities.
I have the cynical belief that many fundamentalists are intrinsically and subconsciously (but unintentionally) more concerned about socio-political alignment than real faith. Their language, words and vernacular are those of the common Christian, but their heart is in socio-political alignment.
You may have found that I have become more secular in my mindset but I would disagree that secular = "less faithful."
Secularism is the clothing I wear, in much the same way that the notion of a "saviour," redemption, etc. dominate the words, language, expression and vernacular of a fundamentalist Christian. The fundamentalist Christian likes to chant slogans but can he express his faith without slogans? Can he truly speak from his heart without words like "saviour" and "redemption?" Can a fundamentalist Christian stop speaking religionese?
I don't want a guy who will just chant slogans at me day after day. I want someone who can speak and sing from the heart. I don't want to see religionese (not too much anyway).
I may appear to be more and more of an outsider but I still consider myself to be an insider. In becoming more secular I may have appeared more like
them (the secular minded) and less like
you, but I think I understand the outsiders better because I have made my thinking more compatible with them. It has also helped me to understand Jesus in a whole new way.
How can outsiders learn about Christianity if you don't understand their reality? That's my interest and concern.