Thanks, Impy, for the engaging response! I agree with you and believe that healthy and loving polyamorous relationships would be very rare and only possible among a group of committed, highly self-actualized and respectful people, and even then would be difficult all around.
I've been reading Caroline Myss's
Anatomy of the Spirit and found a germane passage on sexuality that I'd like to share:
Besides creating life, sex is an avenue of self-expression, a means of making a statement about our comfort in relating physically to the world around us. Sexuality connects us to our own bodies and physical needs as well as to our potential for exploring our erotic and sensual aspects. Sexual eroticism is a form of physical and emotional liberation as well as of spiritual liberation. Why spiritual? Erotic pleasure is, by nature, "in the moment," an encounter in which we drop most of our physical boundaries in order to enjoy the full measure of human contact. Explored without shame, erotic energy can elevate the human body and spirit into sensations of ecstacy, at times producing altered states of consciousness.
--Anatomy of the Spirit, pgs 142-143
Sexual expression without shame is somewhat rare in our society. The earliest messages we get about sex are full of innuendos, taboos, hush-hush, stoney silences, embarassment, and negative thou-shalt-not commandments. The sexually curious child has very few resources presented to hir; (s)he often explores alone, in the dark, and then risks shaming about masturbation or promiscuity. Traditionally, ours is a very sex-negative culture. Sex is often seen as a means to an end (to produce children) or reserved for marriage. Ah, the legacy of our puritanical forepeople (speaking as an American)!
Of course the traditional take on sexuality has been challenged by the counterculture, artists, and literati for as long as it has been prevalent. From Walt Whitman to Alan Ginsberg to Susie Bright and Carol Queen, the challenges to establishment sexuality just keep-a-comin' (pun intended
), and we have made some great strides as a society in our acceptance or at least tolerance of homosexuality. Yet I feel we are still like scared children and closeted puritanical adults in the face of the awesomeness of the variety of human sexual experience, and many are awash in unchallenged cultural conditioning.
I think that if we are committed to personal and spiritual growth, we have to at least be open to exploring sexuality and allowing some wiggle room with it in our own lives.
Both spirituality and sexuality are too often seen as static, unchanging. Yet to be alive and fully human, we must recognize and cooperate with the fact that every day we are changing beings! For me, a day without a new idea or a challenged perception has become rather boring--and a state of stagnancy.
I wonder about our sexuality on a societal level as well. It's my opinion that, regarding sexuality and sexual self-expression, our civilized societies are still walking around with their
panties in a wad over the most liberating and powerful human experiences (sex, drugs, and... rock and roll?
). I wonder if we were able to let go and enjoy--and let others let go and enjoy without feeling threatened morally, personally, or culturally--would we be bitch-slapping each other as much with bombs n poverty n stuff?
As a side-note (for further research for the curious, perhaps), anyone familiar with Wilhem Reich and "orgone energy"?
Wilhelm Reich - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
The Wilhelm Reich Museum - Biography
