Occasionally I would run into people on the Judaism board I frequented on another forum who would always make a point of warning me that I could hurt myself or even kill myself by getting into Kabbalah if I didn't know what I was doing.
It's like that for a lot of religious traditions. We just have to get used to it.
I always found these warnings rather amusing. I got the feeling that the mostly Orthodox bluenoses who issued these warnings didn't actually know that much (if anything) more than I did, and were just repeating what they had heard from someone else. It all seemed kind of superstitious to me, as though the intent were to scare me off for no good reason.
Sounds a lot like what happens in fairy tales. Some secret society has a secret to protect and says, hush....hush, don't get into this unless you've thought about what you're getting into.....you might get involved in something dangerous. Or maybe you're forbidden to say someone or something's name or visit forbidden places. But to be serious, it's not like that in reality. It never involves the kind of danger people like to think, but I think people like to say that just to sensationalise the matter and make life more interesting lol. Otherwise life and religion would be boring. Watch out. Look behind you. There goes a terrorist. He's going to destroy the government. Then hordes and hordes of barbarians are going to invade our country, to destroy our civilisation. We were entrusted to preserve the story of our great civilisation, so that one day......we will rise up and defeat them.
Even I like the idea. I imagine myself ten years from now building a base of knowledge, formulating some kind of tradition and starting some kind of cult or secret society. SSSSShhhhh........don't tell anyone. Stay away from us unless you know what you're getting into. The fate of the world and universe depend on us fulfilling our mission. Don't screw it up for us.
lol That'd be fun. It'd be like some game.
The other thing I meant by "the inner sanctum" is access to the real sources of power in any religion, i.e. full participation up to and including ordination.
It's just that I personally have always been more attracted to the Western esoteric path, which for me has meant Gnosticism as well as Kabbalah. "Hermeticism" is the usual umbrella term for what I'm getting at here.
I looked up Hermeticism and it seems to be (among other things) a belief in panentheism (ie. The All).
Whether it's panentheism, pantheism, or a belief in a God separate/distinct from Creation and not in Creation, I'm slowly coming to an attitude where I see none of these concepts as universal, absolute or better than the others, although, I kind of identify more with the third. I'm not much of a believer in absolutes or ideals as I used to be. I don't believe that
objective reality is knowable for most people, so I don't believe there's any point trying to contemplate its nature and structure. Our interpretation of reality will always be
subjective.
Whichever one of the three models for God I choose (panentheism, pantheism, ...) to me matters less than having a relationship with the so-called "Supreme God" or "Supreme Power" (however one sees it). I don't even see it as essential to think of this "God" as omnipotent, omnipresent, all-seeing, all-powerful or all-encompassing.
People tend to like to idealise things in the
Ultimate Reality they choose to believe in. Panentheism is the ultimate reality of God manifesting Himself in everything that exists. Pantheism is the ultimate reality of everything being a part of God. The third model might be pursued if you want to refrain from idolatry (according to some Abrahamic traditions) of Creation itself (worshipping created things). It is seen as
noble to believe in
idealisations.
I'm starting to think that maybe it's better not to be believe in an idealisation but to only devote myself in a relationship with the so-called "Supreme God/Power" as I see that as noble as well. I don't see it as blasphemy to not believe in an all-powerful, all-whatever God. What happens if He is not the idealisation we wanted? We would have to accept Him for not being ideal.
I suppose we'll all doomed to believe in
idealisations, or choosing to be noble with what we believe. Even I, in choosing to not devote myself to an Ideal God, am trying to be noble. If being noble is a sign of arrogance, then even trying not to be noble is arrogant as that is an attempt to be noble and therefore a sign of one's arrogance, an attempt to be better (more noble) than others. .....and yeah, we all try to be better than each other in what we believe. It's a competition.
That's a rather extreme view, but it could serve as a tool of caution. When I was in high school I had the extreme view that everything was idolatry, everything people did was a sign of arrogance and selfishness. Human beings were fundamentally evil and everything they did was in self-interest. Even living and breathing in itself was self-interest. You couldn't even escape self-interest by committing suicide, because that in itself was to act in self-interest. Detachment? Mindlessness? No that was just as bad. But then I became a realist......
Lately I'm also becoming more and more interested in Neopaganism, and this is partly because of my daughter's strong commitment to Reclaiming. One of the things I appreciate the most about Neopaganism that there simply *IS* no sexism to overcome, so I don't have to put up with even the vestiges of it. There is also no hierarchical power structure, which seems to go hand in hand with patriarchy, and which I see as basically elitist, undemocratic and disempowering to the individual, whether male or female.
In other words, it would be hard for me to overstate just how allergic I am to authoritarianism in ANY form! To me a "Gatekeeper" is a self-apponted voice of authority, someone who tries to tell me my path "should" be something other than what it is, or who tries to tell me certain areas are or should be off limits for me.
I'm a bit of a rebel and anti-authoritarian/anti-establishmentist myself
, and dislike slavery to dogma and semantics, alignment to ideology and to political systems and political structures. The power and true meaning of a tradition can only be unleashed by an individual discovering their own personal identity, not by conformity to ideology. It is when you know
who you are as a person, that you then know how to proceed with a tradition. The bright side of many pagan religions is just that -- you discover yourself.
But......I think there is still a Gatekeeper mentality in me, due to the fact that I see those who are slaves to authoritarian leaders as not wielding the full power of their tradition or reaching their full potential as individuals.
The slaves fall short because of their loss of individuality, and the authoritarian religious leaders fall short because they are fools and blind to the fact that they have slaves and are doing a disservice to their followers by destroying their individuality. But the thing is . . . I'm not being authoritarian. I'm not enslaving . . . I just have a "better" understanding of things. I'm warning them that they are on the wrong path.
They have the mistaken belief that the power comes from the tradition (which is a kind of idolatry), rather than themselves. (don't take this too seriously, by the way, I was just making a point.
)
I do believe knowledge and experience (
gnossis) are important as it helps us to avoid ideological slavery and avoid ideologically enslaving others. I commend those who chose to be slaves of ideology for their innocence and loyalty
, but when their leaders die, leave or are deposed, they either become more enslaved because of their fervent beliefs or face the truth. Knowledge and experience are necessary for spiritual freedom, liberation and emancipation for most people. It's like education. Some people neglect their spiritual education and are enslaved by cults and fundamentalisms.
