Obviously you have your reasons for being here and sharing your words, even if it is personal.
You are strongly entrenched in a religion which requires your belief and participation, for something which you cannot see, and by your own words experience, and you tell me I am having problems with brain chemistry?
Simple truth is that there is a purpose to incarnating in the physical, and it has very little to do with being saved by another. Just my perspective.
My experiences are, quite obviously to me, going to be unique. They are also however, typical in more way than one.
I believe with your state of mind, religion is more than appropriate for you. I however, have released my needs and fears concerning what will happen to me upon death, and realize that my own actions and desires will affect me in a very direct way. I have no need to reach for something I cannot see and trust what someone else tells me about the Truth. I can experience that for myself, as well as the rest of the folks reading this. They just don't realize it.
Which of course brings me to what I am doing here: sharing something that could be potentially valuable for the right folks - from my own experience.
One who was previously in the habit of tricking seekers could indeed have considerable problems verifying what I am saying: but that is consequences of actions, not punishment.
Considering the concepts I have introduced, for you to feel you have heard anything near a thorough explanation is unrealistic. If you think what I shared was complex, it's because you do not understand it in full yet; it's really very simply understood, though I have very little idea of the mechanics of much, I just figure out what I can and when. It is not, however, difficult to understand.